We laid there, as we usually did, too hot for covers, my shirt askew. She wore only a tank those black lacey short underwear that women think men like as she snored softly. The TV was on some weird infomercial that wasn't on when we fell asleep. I sat on the edge of the uncovered mattress and lit a cigarette. I didn't have to look at the clock to know it was earlier than most would want to wake up. How could I wake up, if I never really slept anyway?
She didn't move when I got up. The room was a mess, so I just walked on what ever was on the floor that wasn't food or old food containers. I made my way to the living room and plopped on the couch. I thought it would be cooler, but I was wrong. In any case, I was more comfortable here anyway.
I heard a low rumble in the distance as a storm moved in on the humid night. I thought about when it used to rain and we'd run outside in t-shirts, giggling and splashing the puddles like we were 13 again. I thought about sitting on the roof and watching the lightning streak the sky, my arm around her shoulders, marveling at nature.
I took a long, heavy drag off my Marlboro. It's not what it used to be anymore. I don't catch her smiling at me anymore. I don't go out of the way to please her. We just go about our lives in meaningless circles, pretending at romance. Like we have time for that anymore. Most nights, we went to bed separately.
Ash fell from my cig, lightly burning my chest. What would I be without her though I thought to myself. I've known her all my life, we've been together for almost as long. Shared our first kiss, our first romance, our first everything. A smile tugged at the corners of my mouth, remembering the first time I said "I love you". She stammered, her face turning bright. She couldn't even say a word, she just laughed and kissed me. Her blush gave me life that day. Today, it reminded me of my love.
My heart skipped a little thinking about our first tentative touch. We'd been sitting atop a rock after hiking all day. We'd laughed so hard we'd cried and as the sun sank below the horizon, I shakily reached over, stopping half way. She looked at me and laughed, grabbing my hand in return. Those memories flooded my brain. Making me think about all the good things we had. It made me remember how much I cared about her. I couldn't live my life without her.
This made me rise from the couch. The rain now paddling the windows, thunder clapping occasionally. I stepped lightly across the floor, back into the bedroom where she still snored slightly. I leaned down, wiping the sweat soaked hair from her cheek. "Breakfast?" I whispered in her ear. She smiled that beautiful smile of hers. It made me snort. Instead of heading to the kitchen, I slipped my arms around her waist, rolling her over as I flopped onto the bed. She groaned and fought feebly. This made me giggle which made her laugh as well. We wrestled for a few minutes, acting like teenagers again. Once we caught our breath, I held her tightly, taking in the smell of her.
"I love you"
